Day three-I wonder how long I’ll go with remembering to write every day?
Today, I wrote a 5,343 word piece that completely steamrolled me. I mean that literally–this piece totally took me over. I came home from a meeting, sat down on the couch, and wrote. Two hours later, I had a piece. It’s called “Anti.” I think it will wind up as one of the opening sections of my memoir, someday, once I go back and edit it. It’s equal parts beautiful and horrifying. I love it, but I don’t want to; the writing is beautiful, that much I can say. But the experiences contained within it are most definitely not.
This is part of the memoir writing process. Exorcising the chaos from within. There’s a gateway that’s been opened, a wall inside of me that seems to be falling down. Without all of these bits and pieces, I wouldn’t be who I am today. Writing them out gives them form and shape, for sure. But it also shares a story that needs to be heard. It bends the experiences to my will; it shapes them to be what I want.
All this to say, I find it amazing how something so beautiful can come from a pile of crap. In learning how to write, how to REALLY write, I have NEVER felt so alive. This is what it’s all about.